how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
