at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
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