he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
home. puking in laundry basket.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Randomize
