Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
