this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
