I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
NoShamevember. You game?
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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