We're like a lot better than the average bears
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
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