dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
