It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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