they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
