Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
True strength comes from lack of pants
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
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