I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Randomize
