Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
I need to calm my uterus...
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize