I can tuck mytits in my pants
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
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