you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
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