Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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