Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
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