If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Randomize