I just made out with a guy for $7.
dude i'm inner monologue high
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
