I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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