Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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