So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize