we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
Randomize
