the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize
