so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Randomize
