Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Still dying that you shit outside
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
I came so hard my ears popped.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize
