i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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