It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
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