somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
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