I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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