Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
