She's JV to your varsity
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize
