Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Randomize