considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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