I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize
