Nicole vs. Life
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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