super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
Randomize
