Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
