Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
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