***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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