dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
She's the barista slut.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
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