People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
