One girl and one boy is just not enough.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
