is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
