How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
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