So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
