I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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