May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize