She said her name was "party"
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
