We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
